US flag Monday 18th June 2018
Washington, DC, USA

Capital One Arena


[Desire ends]

Bono: "Desire... greed... show-offiness... deceit... lust... vanity – all the essentials for a showman like myself. And of course... a licence... to just look... in the mirror... as long as I like." [approaches iPad on a stand; sees a devilish face superimposed over his own image]

Crowd: [laughter and cheers]

MacPhisto: [admiringly] "Ohhh!  Very revealing." [sniggers] "Please allow me to introduce myself. I'm a man of wealth and... taste." [sniggers] "Been around a long, long year... stole many a man's soul... to waste. Pleased to meet you!" [chuckles] "Hope you guess my name."

Crowd: [whoops]

MacPhisto: "My name is... Mr Mac...Phisto, actually."

Crowd: [cheer]

MacPhisto: "Though I-- I sometimes dress up as... Mick Jagger." [sniggers]

Crowd: [cheers and applause]

MacPhisto: "I'm having somewhat of a comeback..." [sniggers] "...just of late. So nice to be in the Capitol when you're all fighting amongst yourselves!"

Crowd: [whoops and laughter]

MacPhisto: "I especially love... people using the Bible to justify anything they WANT!"

Crowd: [cheers and applause]

MacPhisto: "Ha ha ha ha!  Wonderful, bravo!" [claps]

Crowd: [applause continues]

MacPhisto: "And whatever happens... don't mention... the... C-word." [wheezy laugh]

Crowd: [laughter]

MacPhisto: "Comp-ro-mise. Oh, excuse my French!" [sniggers]

Crowd: [laughter and whoops]

MacPhisto: "I love the extremities. No middle in the muddle, just piddle in the puddle. And as much demonisation as possible. Make it... personal. I love it when you get personal in your insults with each other. Oh, and DC?  It's when you don't believe I exist – that's when I do my best work." [sniggers]

[Acrobat begins]

MacPhisto: "Don't believe what you hear. Don't believe what you see. If you just close your eyes, you can feel the enemyyy!  Haaa!"


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